God's Purpose In Your Marriage - Love & Submit Part 1

Dear Saints,

As I took my early morning walk, I was reminded of Satan’s relentless effort to destroy God’s ordained relationships, especially marriage/family. I walked by my two neighbors in a relationship the Bible calls an abomination against God. I have come to love, pray and be friendly to these two people so that God will have mercy and pour His grace on them for salvation.

God ordained and instituted marriage from the beginning between Adam and Eve, and not Adam and Steve. USA’s laws and some other countries recognize Adam and Steve. We respect that, but it is not godly and righteous for any nation.

Adam and Eve sinned and disobeyed God, and the attack on marriage started. We have all sinned, and we need God’s mercy and grace. Marriage/family is part of God's design and amplification of His plan of salvation, hence Christ's love for the church and her submission to Christ. Trust/faith in God is the only means for our salvation, relationship with God, and marriage/family relationships.

We that claim to be in a godly and righteous relationship with a husband (a man) or wife (a woman) are obligated to trust God and live to His glory. It is in this background that Apostle Peter addresses wives and husbands in 1 Peter 3:

“Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, ² when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. 

³ Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— ⁴ rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God. 

⁵ For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands, ⁶ as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror.

A Word to Husbands

⁷ Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered". 1 Peter 3:1-7.

The “Likewise” refers to what Peter already said in chapter two. We must submit to God-ordained authority in the home and society.  Christ, perfect and sinless, suffered on our behalf to bring and reconcile us to God the Father through His death on the cross for our sins. 

Christ is not inferior but equal and co-existent with the Father submitted to Him. Jesus is our perfect example and power to live daily like Him in marriage/family and other relationships. Likewise, the wife is not inferior to the husband but co-heir of God's grace with her husband. 

Listen to Jesus:

“Then He [Jesus] said to them all, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me. ²⁴ For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will save it.” Luke 9:23-24.

There is a daily cross for all of us to carry – single or married. Wife, your nearest cross is your “own husband.” Likewise, the husband, your wife, is your most immediate cross.

Before we go too far, what is the meaning of “submit” used here? It is “To yield oneself to the authority or will of another.” In other words, you don’t have to but choose to yield. Jesus did not have to die on the cross for us. Jesus lovingly chose to die on the cross for our sins to "bring us to God."

Apostle Peter, emphasized “own husband.” The wife is encouraged to submit to her “own husband” and not to every man. In the church then and now, some husbands were obedient believers in Christ, and some were not. Peter is appealing to all wives but especially to wives of unbelieving husbands so “that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, ² when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear [of God].”

Peter is calling for an evangelistic outreach of a believing wife to an unbelieving husband. Just think about it. Would you want your husband to go to hell? Some may say yes but don’t raise your hand, please. Then and now, some of these husbands were mean and harsh. Peter is saying, I hear you. The truth is that we can all be mean and vicious except for the work of the Holy Spirit.

Wife, your husband has not and will never earn your submission, but for the sake of Christ, please “yield” to him, and maybe there will be a Holy Spirit transformation in your husband. In no way does “submit or submissive” give room for physical abuse, and if you are in that situation, please get immediate help and be safe.

Few words on apparel, make-up, hairstyle, and beauty. Sisters, dress modestly and look the best for Jesus. You are the daughter of the King of kings. Please be and dress like a princess, and that is who you are. Your best dress is "incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God." 

We will continue next week in our study of 1 Peter 3. We had an August break. Yes, what about the husband? Please stay tuned.

Let's all win souls for Christ by our “conduct,” especially wives of unbelieving husbands. We can never wish hell even for our worst enemy/husband/wife. The purpose of enduring suffering in any relationship is the same as that of Jesus, to “bring us to God.” (1 Peter 3:18). Wife, bring your husband/family to Christ and vice versa. Please pray for them. Amen. 

Trust God for your husband and spoil him with your "beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit." Talk less and act more - "your chaste conduct accompanied by fear[of God]." 

Father, we thank you for all women and all wives. You made all women in your very image. Lord, please help all women, daughters, mothers, single parents, and sisters in Christ live out your purposes in creation to your glory. Please protect and grant wisdom and sufficient grace to all wives in challenging marriages. Amen.

Lord, please bless all marriages and strengthen our families so that we may live for your glory; and that at the end be a family in heaven and not only on earth. 

Lord, please intervene in Christopher and wife's marriage. He is asking God to save and restore their marriage. Please soften their hearts to receive and give your love to one another. Amen.

Relationship with God through Christ is key to relating in marriage/family. Do you believe and trust Christ as your Lord and savior? If not, please do so now. Lord, I confess my sins and trust/believe you died on the cross for me. Please forgive me and fill me with your Holy Spirit to relate to you and live for you. Amen.